Moving Forward While Feeling Stuck
Photo Credit: Joshua Harris on Unsplash
As 2021 ended, many people were moving forward into new passions and letting go of the past. Everything from writing a first song to moving into a new home was on the table during the holidays. Well, at least that was the intention, until Omicron hit.
Omicron is the most contagious variant yet, but what’s remarkable is that most of us seem to be responding differently than we did at the start of the pandemic. It took one COVID case in March of 2020 for entire school districts to close, but somehow, most people have COVID this week and almost nothing is closed. Maybe it’s because this is now the third surge from a major variant, but people are gaining mental flexibility to cope. How?
I’ll tell you how: Radical Acceptance.
We all have very personal differences in how we handle COVID, but no matter those differences, many of us have reached some level of acceptance of this bizarre circumstance.
For example, despite the recent surge, some people are traveling, going to bars, or behaving as if there is no pandemic. These individuals might think, “eh, it’s out of my control now... might as well live like there’s no tomorrow (because in some cases there may not be!)”
That’s radical acceptance.
We can also examine the people who are staying at home for the most part or completely isolating themselves during this wave of Omicron. They might say, “Well it’s another period of high risk, so I’ve accepted that I will be stuck at home during these times and I’m not going to see much of my community because I prefer to feel a sense of safety.”
That’s also radical acceptance.
To give a sense of how much our worldviews have changed since the start of the pandemic, let’s check out a quote from Lord of the Rings. During this dialogue, Frodo Baggins realizes the almost unbearable burden of carrying the “One Ring” to be destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom. For our purposes, the “One Ring” is COVID:
Frodo: I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.
Gandalf: So do all who live to see such times but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.
Now replace Frodo with “everyone in March 2020” and Gandalf with “everyone in January 2022”.
So, if Gandalf is you, congratulations! You are part of the population that has reached a new level of mental flexibility when it comes to this pandemic.
But maybe you are Frodo. Maybe you have a point that things would be better if the pandemic never happened. But maybe you are also driving yourself bananas trying to gain some control of the uncontrollable. If you find yourself in search of some guidance to realize your radical acceptance potential, here’s a tip:
Take out a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle. To the left, list the things that are in your control about the pandemic. To the right, list the things that are out of your control about the pandemic. Here’s mine:
This list will direct you to exactly the things you have and haven’t accepted as within or outside of your control. Am I frustrated about shipping delays? Sure I am! Am I going to let that delay absorb my energy, complain, shake my fists in fury, and rue the day that I ordered from a shady online service when I clearly should have known better? Maybe for a second. But it gets old quickly.
What’s in my control is the awesome art I’ve been able to start. I’ve written and released music that I think is really exciting (check it out here). If I shift my focus to the things I can control, it is enough to let go of my need for “fairness” when it comes to things I can’t control.
Where are you in your radical acceptance journey? What have you accepted? What are you still letting go of? Share in the comments section below!
This has been your reflection on the energy of the week. I am a licensed psychotherapist who likes science and spirituality. Tune in next week for new insights!